Technically, American Valentine's Day is a two-way street - both the guys and the girls are supposed to buy something for each other. But if I had to choose, I would say that in the U.S., the onus of Valentine's Day falls much more heavily on the male of the species than on the female. Overall, the sentiment seems to be, "Lord have mercy, boys, would it kill you to be romantic one day out of the whole dang year?"
For Korean, men, however, February is a breeze. Valentine's Day here consists of women buying chocolates and gifts for the men. The men just kick back and enjoy.
Before you start booking your flights, though, realize that what goes around comes around. February 14 is for the men, so March 14, White Day, is for the ladies. Originating, apparently, with a Japanese candy consortium in 1978, White Day has since spread to Korea and Taiwan. Being a good wife, I did not blame Justin for forgetting White Day and even gave him all the dark chocolate in the candy sets that my students gave me. Waste not, want not.
At APIS, Valentine's Day was more heavily celebrated than White Day, although both resulted in copious amounts of candy given to teachers. (Koreans cannot resist the chance to give things to teachers - see Pepero Day). Maybe this is because the culture at APIS is more international/Western. It may also be a sign that as much as manufacturers would like to multiply candy sales by setting up a second holiday, it hasn't completely taken hold here. It will be interesting to see, over the next decade or so, who wins out in the cultural-influence arena: the U.S./West with a mutual or male-heavy Valentine's Day, or Japan with Valentine's Day and White Day. (Note: PLEASE settle this in the Thunderdome. Please?)
But the fun doesn't stop here! If you're a woman in a relationship, you know what to do, and if you're a man in a relationship, you know what to do. But what about those rocking the single life?
Let's look at the pattern: Feb 14, Valentine's Day, women. March 14, White Day, men. April 14 is next - and it's Black Day.
For Black Day, single people get together and eat Jajang Noodles, or noodles in a black bean sauce. (Yes, they're as gross as they look.) Now, it's possible that this is a wacky, fun-filled occasion, with people playing MASH and laughing at us lame married folk, but I picture it more like those old Peanuts strips where Lucy would invite all the neighborhood girls for a crab-in. A black day, indeed.
This is made even better by the fact that April 14 is my sister's birthday, and I always used to make fun of her for the various horrible things that have happened on that day in history (Lincoln was shot, the Titanic sank, etc. Look it up if you don't believe me.) So this one's for you, Jackie. Don't you wish you had a happy day like me?
Non-Korea addendum: According to intrepid college pal Leslie, there are two Russian holidays in February and March set out for men and women as well - Protectors of the Homeland day for men on the 23rd of February, and International Women's Day on March 8. See her blog here for more info. Leslie, if you're reading - what about Valentine's? I saw that you went to a Valentine's party, but was that more of an international thing? What does the average Russian couple do on Feb 14?
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2 comments:
You know, I would have thought that jajang noodles would be more appealing to westerners than most Korean fare...it's not so spicy and has a kind of greasy junk food thing going on with it.
Interestingly, when restaurants deliver jajang noodles, they come with nondisposable bowls which you're supposed to leave outside your door after you're done so the delivery guy can pick it up later.
But I'm guessing you guys won't be ordering any delivery jajang noodles any time soon...
Yeah, there's Valentine's Day here, too, but it's just seeped in from the West in the last 15 years or so. It's called "The Day of All Who Are In Love," but there doesn't seem to be any clear tradition yet regarding what you're supposed to do for it. It comes so close to the big Men's and Women's Days that I don't think anyone makes a big deal of it in terms of gift-giving. I got several Valentines from students (all females), which seems common, and the shops were all filled with little Valentine's trinkets (all rat-themed this year, as Russia's obsession with the Eastern zodiac dictates). Other than that, a bunch of students from our institute used it as an excuse to go clubbing.
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